


Modern Romance for the Gifted

by rabidfan



Category: Stargate Atlantis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-14
Updated: 2014-02-14
Packaged: 2018-01-12 08:03:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,497
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1183874
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rabidfan/pseuds/rabidfan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>When Hot!Neighbor (John, he thought.  His name is John) stepped out of his room the next morning he was clad in nothing but a smile.  Rodney scrambled out of the deck chair he’d been sitting in and launched himself towards the telescope still sitting in his living room.  </p><p>“Damn, damn, damn.”  He barked the tripod against his shin, nearly tripping him and sending both the scope and himself over the balcony railing.  “No dying, no dying,” he sing-songed while setting up the scope in record time.  “Stay naked, stay naked,” he continued as he locked the tripod into position.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Modern Romance for the Gifted

**Author's Note:**

> This is for the Romancing McShep Valentines ficathon thing. Well, that's not what _they_ call it, but that's immaterial. There was a prompt featuring the Greater Osage Grouse mating strut display? Yeah, that one. No. It’s not like it but it started it. Yes?
> 
> Beta help provided by the always lovey Lexstar29. She is awesome. You should not hold mistakes and…stuff…against her!

**Title:** Modern Romance for the Gifted  
 **Author:** rabidfan  
 **Rating:** PG? Maybe? Some swearing  
 **Pairing:** Wait? You mean it wasn’t supposed to be McKay/Sheppard??  
 **Word Count:** 3,310

 **A/N:** There was a prompt featuring the Greater Osage Grouse mating strut display? Yeah, that one. No. It’s not like it but it started it. Yes?

Beta help provided by the always lovey . She is awesome. You should not hold mistakes and…stuff…against her!

 **Summary:** When Hot!Neighbor (John, he thought. His name is John) stepped out of his room the next morning he was clad in nothing but a smile. Rodney scrambled out of the deck chair he’d been sitting in and launched himself towards the telescope still sitting in his living room. 

“Damn, damn, damn.” He barked the tripod against his shin, nearly tripping him and sending both the scope and himself over the balcony railing. “No dying, no dying,” he sing-songed while setting up the scope in record time. “Stay naked, stay naked,” he continued as he locked the tripod into position.

 

~*~

Doctor M. Rodney McKay was pretty pleased with the new apartment. It was a rat hole, of course…the University wouldn’t stretch the budget to get him something that actually _suited human habitation_ , not for a temporary employee such as himself…but it had some excellent redeeming qualities. Rodney raised his field glasses back to his eyes to appreciate the best of those qualities.

The apartment in the building across from his was modern, elegant: expansive with glass walls along two of its sides. In short it was everything Rodney’s was not. The people who lived in that beautiful building probably thought that being so high in the New York skyline saved them from the prying eyes of neighbors. Not so. The clear walls of the side facing Rodney made them all targets of his curiosity; players in his fantasies. Especially the guy in the center apartment. Hot. Hot. Hot. And his glass walled bathroom with its glass walled shower enclosure ensured that Rodney could watch him each night while he prepped for bed. Sadly, the bedrooms themselves where on the other side of the building and therefore out of sight for Rodney and his more lurid fantasies. Pity. Still, the show that his very Hot!Neighbor put on each day was one he enjoyed watching. 

Placing the field glasses on the cheap plastic deck chair, he began adjusting the sights on the telescope perched on the last remaining space available on his pitiful excuse for a balcony. He breathed out a sigh of pleasure at the sharpened image displayed. Hot!Neighbor was exiting what Rodney assumed was his bedroom, dressed sharply in suit and tie. Rodney allowed himself to watch a little longer, taking in the man while he poured coffee into a go-cup and folded his paper. 

Jeannie would have kittens if she knew what uses he put her birthday gift to. Not that he was going to tell her. But, reasonably, how could she expect it to be used? What with the light pollution in the city center…

Rodney shook himself. Distractions. Too many distractions. Concentrate on the hot guy in the next building. Yes. 

Rodney drew in a breath as the object of his prurient interests walked over to the wide expanse of windows, peering out across to Rodney’s building. Looking…looking directly at Rodney’s balcony. Huh. 

Rodney stood up and squared his shoulders. It may be that Hot!Neighbor was on to him. Disappointing. Now he’d most likely call the police. Or close his blinds. Either would be problematic for Rodney. Hot!Neighbor didn’t seem to be upset. Perhaps he wasn’t as mentally acute as Rodney had first thought. Perhaps Rodney had escaped notice. While it served as a warning to keep his _surveillance_ of Hot!Neighbor to the hours of darkness it also reminded Rodney that most people…evidently including Hot!Neighbor…were too stupid to live.

In a way that was more of a disappointment than the possibility of a visit from the police.

Rodney sighed. It was time to go and try to teach the unwashed and unlettered. Perhaps he’d get a glimpse of Hot!Neighbor when what visible stars there were came out tonight. 

Something to look forward to.

~*~

John Sheppard wasn’t unhappy with the apartment that his father’s company had supplied for him. It was spacious. It was clean. It had a kick-ass sound system and a wall of windows that kept him from feeling like he’d been locked up. It was high enough that when the sun went down it was almost like flying. 

Except for the hideous building across from his. 

John sighed. Six months. He’s promised his father that he’d give it six months. _“Use that charm of yours and recruit two scientists for the new project. I’ll give you a list, you go seduce them.”_ Right. Seduce. John sighed. One month down, five to go. He’d spent three tours in Afghanistan, one in Iraq. He’d eaten bugs for dinner. He’d crashed landed a helicopter while it was _on fire_ and walked away without a scratch. He could live in New York City for five more months.

Maybe the first two geeks he ‘seduced’ would sign on the dotted line and John would be free. Then he could go…

He didn’t really have anywhere else to go.

John sighed. Time to go wrangle with the suits another day. He couldn’t imagine living like this forever. Thankfully, Dave seemed to like it. Five more months and he’d be free.

Wandering out onto his balcony, John looked over at the ugly building blocking his view of the park beyond. 

Someone was out on the (scaryrustedveryveryunsafe) balcony directly across from his own (muchnicersoverysafeandluxurious) one. Someone that seemed to be spying on him with a telescope. He fought the urge to wave. Maybe it was time to have some blinds put up. Shrugging, he went back to gather his briefcase and coat before heading out. Figuring out what to do about Strange!Neighbor would have to wait until he was done for the day.

*~*

John juggled his coat, briefcase, coffee and morning paper as he struggled out of the taxi. Dave had assured him a limo was at his disposal but John didn’t want to go there. Riding around in a limo was too _corporate_ for his taste. Too close to being the sell-out he caught glimpses of each morning while he shaved. 

In truth, John was afraid he’d begin to enjoy the trappings of luxury that came with the (temporary) title of CFO Dave (and Dad) had draped over his unwilling shoulders. 

In truth, John knew that both Dave and their father hoped for that very thing. In his own way, the elder Sheppard was trying for rapprochement. Trying to bridge the chasm of years and silence to welcome John back into the family hold. The fact that John had been fighting that familial pull didn’t seem to dampen the enthusiasm it was being offered with.

In truth, John feared that his will for independence and distain for high-rise living wasn’t going to be enough to win the growing battle of wills.

~*~

Rodney pinched the bridge of his nose in despair. None of these morons deserved his time and considerable brilliance. Remembering the very large honorarium he was receiving for the six months of his life he’d sold the University was all that kept him from throwing his notes down and stalking out for good.

“Perhaps you could examine your laughable attempt at physics, Mr. Mycroft. Humor me. In fact, why don’t you take this pitiable attempt at a paper and rework it over the weekend? Hmm? Perhaps while _sober_? See what you can do to make it less horrific than it is, won’t you? Return it to me on Monday.”

Rodney glared out at the hushed, terrified graduate students that he’d been saddled with. “Get out before I kill you all with the power of my displeasure.” The scramble to gather books, laptops and backpacks did nothing to ease the pounding of Rodney’s head. “Be ready for a test on chapters twenty through twenty-two on Monday. No excuses.”

“Class dismissed.” The stampede for the exits was fairly satisfying. Rodney gathered his own papers together and headed for the staff parking lot. Another day done. He looked up to the sky when a fat drop of water hit his cheek.

“Damn.” Covering his head with his portfolio, Rodney broke into a trot. He managed to get to the car before the worst of the storm hit but it was small comfort.

There would be no telescope usage tonight.

*~*

John shook his overcoat to get the worst of the water off before chucking it over the back of his couch. He kicked off his sodden dress shoes and headed for his bathroom, already stripping off his wet clothes in hopes of a long, hot shower to ease the chill from his bones.

Someone should invent a thought-activated shower, he thought. That would be _awesome_. 

Dropping the last of his clothes on the tile, John stepped into the steam with a sigh of pleasure. Ruefully, he admitted to himself that he’d be calling for the limo if the rain didn’t let up. Trying to hail a cab in the downpour had not been fun. He had meetings scheduled all over town tomorrow. No way was he dodging in and out of cabs to get it all done.

John spared a thought about the Peeping Tom across the way from him but decided getting warm was more important than being modest. Hopefully the rain would keep the crazy man off his balcony.

~*~

Rodney could see the outline of Hot!Neighbor in his shower. Just a tantalizing outline. He’d tried to set the telescope up inside but the continuing downpour made focus control impossible. 

He’d have to wait for tomorrow night. He was convinced that setting up in the morning would be a bad idea. He’d nearly been caught this morning. Risking it would be foolish. 

By the time Rodney collapsed onto his own bed, hours later, he’d nearly convinced himself.

~*~

John rolled over when his alarm blared out its morning greeting. The rain still pounded down outside. All the time in Afghanistan he’d wished for some rain. Now that he had it in plentitude? He’d be fine with it drying up. 

Shrugging at his own contrary nature, John struggled out of his bed and wandered towards the phone. He might as well get that call in for a ride. 

*~*

Rodney exited his building just as Hot!Neighbor was being handed into a limo. “Huh.” he thought. Not for the first time he wondered who the hot guy was, where he went each morning.

Snapping his fingers as inspiration struck, Rodney scrambled to find a pen and paper before Hot!Neighbors’ town car pulled away from the curb. “Paper, paper, paper.” No paper. He pulled the cap off the Sharpie he’d found and scrawled the license number of the limo onto his palm. 

“Hah!” he cried. “Now we’ll see who you are.” Shoving the pen back into his portfolio, Rodney pulled out his cell. Time to call in some favors.

~*~

Scientists.

John counted talking to scientists right up there with living in New York as things he wouldn’t miss when his time at Sheppard Industries, New York came to an end. The running tally in his head caulked one more into the “paranoid and unreasonable” category.

Sighing, he pulled his appointment list out of his jacket. Maybe before he went to see the next one on the list he could grab some lunch. 

“Who’s next, sir?” 

John smiled. The driver of the company limo turned out to be someone he’d served with. The joy of being reunited with Aidan…and seeing that he’d managed to overcome his dependency issues…made the long morning bearable.

“Radek Zelenka. He’s at the Hilton on Madison.” John stowed the list and sat back in the comfortable seat. “He’s not expecting us until 2. Let’s grab some lunch first.”

“Sounds good, sir.” Aidan flashed a dazzling smile in the rear-view mirror. “On you?”

“On the company,” John snorted with amusement. “Might as well get something out of the day. We’re not having too much success with recruitment.”

“There’s still tomorrow, sir. I’m sure some of them will want to work for you.”

“Tell me again why I missed you, Aidan?”

The young man’s uncomplicated laugh lightened John’s heart. He decided to talk to Dave about taking Aidan with him where ever he ended up next. He’d missed having a friend.

*~*

When Hot!Neighbor (John, he thought. His name is John) stepped out of his room the next morning he was clad in nothing but a smile. Rodney scrambled out of the deck chair he’d been sitting in and launched himself towards the telescope still sitting in his living room. 

“Damn, damn, damn.” He barked the tripod against his shin, nearly tripping him and sending both the scope and himself over the balcony railing. “No dying, no dying,” he sing-songed while setting up the scope in record time. “Stay naked, stay naked,” he continued as he locked the tripod into position.

Rodney bent to peer into the eye piece, hoping against hope that John would wait until Rodney had looked his fill before deciding he should dress for his day. Naked calisthenics? Yoga? Rodney hardened at the thought. 

There. Just a small adjustment and…

~*~

John startled. Strange!Neighbor was on his balcony. On his balcony and staring across the divide at John. John currently without clothes. He gave a moment’s thought to covering his junk…another couple to walking back inside and calling the cops.

He settled for waving.

Watching the weirdo flail and almost tip his expensive-looking scope over the edge of his balcony was pretty sweet.

*~*

“Jesus!” Sheppard (who was still most definitely hot. And hung. Jesus.) was still twiddling his fingers at Rodney though he was having some difficulty getting his laughter under control. Bastard.

Clearly it was time to strategically withdraw back into his apartment. 

He’d collect the scope later. Much, much later.

~*~

John was still laughing when Aidan pulled up in front of his building. 

“Good to see you in such a good mood, sir.” Aidan smiled back at John. “How many geeks will it take to destroy it?”

“Funny guy, Ford.” John pulled his list out. “We need to head over to the University. I still need one more off this list before I’m released from Purgatory. I’m supposed to have coffee with Dr. M. Rodney McKay. Astrophysicist.”

“Sounds like fun, sir.” Aidan pulled the town car into traffic.

“Stop calling me ‘sir’, Ford. I’m _retired_.”

“You got it, sir.”

John sighed. It was going to be another really long day.

~*~

Rodney rushed into his office, heading directly to the coffee maker. He had a stupid meeting with some stupid headhunter. _Coffee_ with some stupid headhunter. Well, they would just have coffee here in his office. Then he could crush the man’s soul and hurry him out the door without losing too much time.

In truth, Rodney had no affection for his post at the University. In truth he felt underappreciated. Still, he was on track for tenure and that wasn’t something to dismiss out of hand. 

Rodney found two semi-clean cups. Setting one beside the coffee pot for his visitor he filled the other to the rim. He sat down at his desk with a sigh. He hated teaching. Hated the stupidity of the academic bureaucracy that controlled how and what he lectured about. It was all so pointless.

Maybe he’d give the head-hunter a chance to explain himself before Rodney crushed his soul.

As if cued, the man in question tapped lightly on the door frame.

“Dr. McKay? My name is John Sheppard…”

John’s voice trailed off. He stared at the white-faced man staring back at him. Then stared some more.

“You,” John exclaimed. “You’re the Peeping Tom that lives across from me.” 

Rodney blushed. He knew he should have kept to nighttime viewing.

“Peeping Tom is an exaggeration, surely. I’m an Astrophysicist. _The_ preeminent Astrophysicist of our day, I’ll have you know. It’s entirely logical…even expected…that a man such as myself would have a telescope on his balcony.”

“You mean the staring at naked men sort of man?” John asked innocently?

“Yes, I mean, no.” Rodney huffed an irritated breath. Damn the man. “I’m sorry, alright? I’m sorry. The first time I saw you it was an accident. I should have stopped. I meant to stop. I’m sorry.” 

Rodney fidgeted. “You’re not going to have me arrested, are you?” His hands flailed in an attempt to properly demonstrate the foolishness of that idea. “I mean, I’m a genius. As such, I’d make an admirable choice to be someone’s bitch behind bars but that’s not what I’d prefer. At all. If given a choice.” 

“Would you like some coffee?” he finished, exhausted.

John found himself unwillingly amused. Truth be told, when he’d realized his appointment for the morning was his crazy-ass neighbor he’d been tempted to leave. Only the thought of staying longer in New York kept him in place. Now he hoped he’d be able to sign the man. For the first time he looked at the future his father had planned for him with something less than despair.

“Coffee would be good, Doctor. What say we go get some where we can also get some breakfast?” John smiled his best, most winning smile. “Bacon, Doctor. I’m reliably told it’s brain food.”

“Wait.” Rodney gestured feebly towards the coffee maker steaming happily on the credenza behind his desk. “I…we.” Another swirling gesture of unknowable intent. 

“But…Bacon?”

“Yes, Rodney,” John didn’t bother to hide his amusement. “May I call you Rodney? I’m given to understand you don’t like being called Meredith.”

If Rodney noticed that his very, very Hot!Neighbor-turned-head-hunter had sidestepped the need to refer to him by his hard-won titles, he gave no indication.

“Rodney, yes. Yes. You can, I mean.” Rodney stuttered to an embarrassed stop. 

“Clearly my blood sugar is low. I’m hypoglycemic, you know. Perhaps breakfast would be good after all.”

John gestured towards the door he still stood in front of. “Shall we go then? I have a car waiting down stairs.”

“Car. Yes. I’ve seen it.” At the reminder of his stalking Rodney felt the hot flush rising up over his cheeks. Awkward. “Don’t think you’ll be able to woo me with your leaning and your…” 

“Awesomely bodacious bod?” John finished, tongue firmly in cheek. 

Rodney moaned. Doomed, so very doomed. “Yes. I suppose that’s what I mean. You have the unfair advantage of knowing I’m attracted to you but it won’t be _you_ that I’ll be working with, now will it? Hmm? No. No, it will be some pinhead with a PhD that he got from a Cracker Jack box and then where will my Noble come from? I ask you!”

John bit down on his cheek to keep him from laughing out loud. This was going to be _fun_. “I happen to know that Dr. Zelenka is a brilliant engineer. You couldn’t ask for a better team than the one we’re assembling.”

“Zelenka? What do you need an engineer and an astrophysicist for? Building spaceships?” 

“Wait. Spaceships? Seriously? Spaceships?”

“That’s the plan. Think that would help with the whole Nobel thing, Rodney?” John let the smile come. 

“What about you?” Rodney blurted. 

“What about me? I have degrees in Aviation, Mathematics and Astronomics. Don’t you think I can contribute?” The pout always won the day so John felt confident that it was time to pull it out now.

“Smart. Pretty, smart and flirty.” Rodney headed down the hall towards the elevators. “Are you flirting just to convince me to sign?”

“No.” John punched the call button and leaned negligently against the wall while waiting for the doors to open. “It’s just an added benefit for me.” He waggled his eyebrows suggestively. “Why don’t we get breakfast at my place, Rodney. I’ve got bacon _and_ coffee.”

Doomed, so very, very doomed. “Yes. Yes, alright.” He exited the building behind Sheppard. “Three degrees? Really? Doctor Sheppard, then?”

John shot his flirty smile back over his shoulder, “Nope. Not yet, anyway.” He stopped next to Aidan and gestured for Rodney to enter the car before him. Popping his head in he teased, “We can talk about that, too.”

“Then chop, chop, Sheppard. Hypoglycemia waits for no man.” He drank in the pretty little smile John gifted him with while he settled in the car. 

Rodney knew at that moment (perhaps several long moments before) that he’d sign any contract Sheppard (John the hot, hot Hot!Neighbor) pulled out. He’d sign away anything just for one more of those flirty, sinfully charming smiles aimed at him.

Truth be told? It didn’t worry him at all.


End file.
